SimonSimple

Hi People

Josh McDowell in his book came up with these useful equations:

Rules + Relationships = Response
Rules - Relationships = Rebellion

How true! Rules with relationships and rules without relationships. What I want to highlight is that whilst we can impose Rules at the snap of the fingers, we cannot just magically ask for Relationships just like that. In fact, whilst the former can be instantly achieved, the latter needs to be constantly nurtured.

The idea is so easy but yet so elusive. Is it because we live in an instant culture, where when we want something, it must be NOW! It is no wonder that we fall into the trap of using Rules to achieve our ends when Relationships is the better way.

I have had good reports of how the twin tools of PSLE & DNA have helped change relationships for the better. Be a Person that Shows Love & Encouragemet and Don’t Nag Anymore. I am serious.

Just yesterday a mother came up to me and shared how in the PSLE year that her child is going through this year, she herself has been a convert and ardent follower of my parenting ‘theories’. Almost with tears in her eyes, she shared how her child has overcome her fear of maths and achieved a 50% improvement in the grades in less than 4 months. Her child is an overcomer and so must we.

The mother has begun to see the light. If your sights are only on exams, it is rather short-term. If you de-emphasise the academic and focus on the relationship, you are preparing your child for life. Ah, that is more meaningful and I assure you, more rewarding. I know from experience from raising our 3 children. Because my focus is wholistic, they are growing up all-rounded and have also shown decent academic grades. Maybe there is nothing wrong with our kids. It is us parents who are in need of change.

The ten most powerful words for effecting change may well be:

If it is to be, it is up to me!

What are you waiting for? Just do a NIKE. Just do it!

FOOD Note:

Today I lunched with some friends at this fabulous place. Fabulous on many counts - the food & price, the ambience and the service. Tell Desmond Jose or Michael that Simon send you when you visit….the West End boutique restaurant at 216 Pasir Panjang Road (Pasir Panjang Village) tel: 6475 2210 Bus nos. 10, 30, 51, 143, 188 & 200. Their tagline: “Excellent Food & Service at down to earth prices.” They serve continental & Asian cuisine. Enjoy.

Hi People

Godliness + Contentment = Great gain.

How can contentment bring me great gain? It is when you have enough, then you can be satisfied and happy! But that is only one aspect of the equation. You need to fear God too. I will leave it to you to get right with God but let me dwell on contentment.

I have a little tune:

Worry is like a rocking chair,
It keeps you busy
Gets you nowhere!

I have a little couplet:

Fix it up,
wear it out.
Make it do,
or do without!

I have a little saying:

Want what you have,
not have what you want.

And many many more wise sayings about delayed gratification and why savings is a virtue. You know what our trouble is? it is not knowledge but application. So a gentle reminder again about this powerful equation:

Simple ideas + ACTION = Powerful change

Here is an ACTION you can take. I have revived an old practice about tracking my expenses. Take a blue notebook, costs you 25 singapore cents but worth a lot if you practise what I share. Starting 1 September until end December 2006. Start recording every cent you spend, whether via cash, credit card or debit card etc every day, on a separate page. As the weeks go by, you will find that you will be more conscious of your spending habits. For example, if you used your credit card, you may be lulled into thinking you have excess cash when actually your financial situation is quite tight. You will find you can easily forgo a cup of designer coffee and have your daily dose at the nearby cooffee shop instead, or have it at home or better still, just have a glass of PUB tap water! It’s healthier.

A penny (or dollar) saved is a penny (or dollar) earned is what my father taught me. In fact you get more out of saving a dollar than by earning a new dollar. A new dollar needs energy to be expended to earn it and it gets taxed, etc etc. So go for the saved dollar.

We need to simplify. De-clutter. Sometimes less is best.

Hi People

Today my wife brought my attention to a Straits Times article in the Life! section entitled “Leave with Kindness”. Subconsciously I changed the title in my mind to “Live with Kindness”.

I grew up in an environment where my parents were very giving and encouraging. I still have fond memories of both my dearly departed father and mother. Even though they had left us many years ago, their teachings, by the way they lived their lives, are still with me. Because they lived with kindness, I too live with kindness. You see, life is a pattern. What your children see in you, you will see in them.

On the way to work today I dropped by Creme of Creams at Blk 28 Hoy Fatt Road #01-3- s(151028). Tel 6272 5250, and bought 6 blocks of ice cream for my staff, for no apparent reason except as an excuse to celebrate.

It is so easy to make people happy, and inexpensive too! Here is a sample of the positive reaction I had from the staff to my little gesture of kindness:

“Thank you for the ice-cream. I ate the red bean flavour and it was delicious.”

“Thank you for the delicious ice cream… My favorite is the red bean ice cream. Yummy!”

“Thank you very much for the ice cream & wafer. It’s a delicious tea-break.”

“Wow, cake for last week and ice-cream for this week. What’s coming up next? Thanks, Simon, for the wonderful treat!”

My staff refers to me affectionately as the GM aka the GrandMother! It is a joy working in the wonderful environment with a Giving culture. Know why I think we should not only “leave with kindness” but “live with kindness”? It is because you’ll get so much more when you give. Indeed a wise proverb goes like this:

A generous man is a prosperous man; He who blesses others will himself be blessed.

It is better to give than to receive. It’ll put a smile on someone else’s face….and yours too. Try it, you’ll not regret it.

Hi People

Last night, my wife had the air-con on as the weather was just unbearable! But because she was also sneezing quite badly and suspecting that she might catch a cold and pass it on to me, I elected to sleep alone on the living room couch….or so I thought!

In our household we are a family of 5 human beings and a dog (one other passed on in March at a ripe old age of 16 plus dog years!). Our male canine member is a handsome brown Cocker Spaniel we call “Bullie”. His temperament is typically happy, trusting and intelligent. Bullie is merry, outgoing and eager to please.

At 6 am in the morning, Bullie will start licking my hands & arms. If this fails to rouse me, he will even go for my face. Thankfully I can distinguish my wife’s loving kisses from my dog’s. So on this particular morning, as I rejected my dog’s “advances” and turned away from him, guess what? he jumped up the low couch and settled himself next to me. I had to literally pushed him away, least my wife catches me sleeping with someone else!

My dog is rather close to me. I feed him and take him out for walks. My children do not sleep with us, even when young. Only my wife sleeps with me. My wife grooms him and attends to his well being. My eldest daughter likes to go for runs with him. My 2nd daughter bathes him. My son has trained him well and he can do tricks - my dog, that is. He is a happy dog. And he wags his tail a lot. You see a happy dog wags its tail and jumps up and down. I suppose a sad dog will put his tail in between his legs, hangs down his head and cower with fear.

If we can picture our family members, old and young alike, our friends & our colleagues with tails - what would we see? Wagging tails or cowered heads hung low. If we are in position of influence & impact, can we all not be CHEER LEADERS or must we be FEAR LEADERS? Choose for yourself what you want to see. It will decide for you what you want to be. Choose to be someone’s best friend. I am my dog’s best friend.

Hi People

I am so enamoured by this truth of PSLE that I feel everyone should try and qualify and have that honorific after their name. For example:

Simon Sim, BBA, DFLE, PSLE

In the early 1970’s I spent 3 years studying to get my Bachelor of Business Administration from the then University of Singapore. In my early fifties I spent 2 years to get my Diploma in Family Life Education awarded by Edith Cowan University. It was only after I got married and became a father that I realised the power of that four letter word ‘PSLE’. I believe some people will spend a whole life time and yet fail to secure the cherished PSLE after their names. Don’t be one of them.

I am Simon Sim, PSLE. I am a Person that Shows Love & Encouragement. I am a Partner that Shows Love & Encouragement. I am a Parent that Shows Love & Encouragement. PSLE is an active word. I do it as a matter of passion and attitude. At the workplace I have seen my staff & colleagues blossomed because I choose to ‘love’ them and encourage them. I see my wife enpowered because I speak positives into her life. I see my 3 children soar to great heights because I choose the way of positive motivation.

Indeed when we fail to affirm someone with our words of love and encouragement it is a hidden form of verbal abuse. One can always motivate through yelling, threats and nagging. It is very negative but nonetheless motivation. I choose to reinforce through positive motivation, a method that will instill courage in the people I influence and impact long after I am gone, physically from their presence or I suspect, from this world.

Often times in my public talks I choose to hand out cans of 7 UP and 100 PLUS. Notice they don’t call them 7 DOWN or 100 MINUS? My staff call them Simon’s trophies. Indeed, on top of our living room cabinet sits a CAN of 100 PLUS or 7 UP (it changes as I replace them at random after I quench my thirst) to constantly remind me why I must promote an environment and a culture of love & encouragement. Just exercising PSLE has put my staff and family members at a distinct advantage over many other people.

What is Simon’s DNA? It is I ‘Don’t Nag Anymore!’

Why? Because my trusty Longman defines Nag as: A noun; a horse; especially one that is old or in poor condition. Still want to nag? Don’t. You will regret it. Try not nagging for 8 weeks. You will love it! I know it will change the lives of people around you, and yours too. Report to me the good news k?